As I type this I'm aware of the potential irony. I'm going to say it nonetheless.
When you go from month to month, wondering if this time you have created a little seed of life, there is little comfort for your impatient anxieties. The overactive mind has a field day - "are my breasts that little bit more tender?" "did I sleep longer than I usually would?" - all in the attempt to predict a pregnancy in the making. Frustratingly, there's not much you can do to validate your hunches, and so...we wander online.
A girl could be forgiven for thinking that a quick five minute peak on google would be informative and hopefully reassuring. But beware naive-wishing-to-be-pregnant-lady, you are about to sell your soul to the crazy baby land.
It's a minefield out there.
Just one handful of words typed into that trusty google search bar opens up a can of self instructed medical diagnoses, confronting personal disclosures and alarmingly inaccurate 'facts'. With the accessibility of the internet thousands of women are online, interacting in forums and 'helping' each other through their experiences.
One thing I have learnt throughout my journey is that it is an entirely personal and individual experience. No two women's bodies are the same, and thus, no two pregnancies will be the same. However it surprised (and a little bit traumatised) me to see that many women have no filter when it comes to processing their experiences in the online arena.
As one vulnerable women posts a question, looking for some guidance and reassurance, many flock to retell their story, regardless of it's relevance or indeed the appropriateness of it's content. We're talking really graphic stories and people relaying advice they believe is fact, but is often nothing more than a badly retold half-truth that they heard from their sister. Frighteningly, it only gets worse once you're actually pregnant. Go on there with a twinge, pain or a strange symptom and sure enough you'll find yourself immersed in a horror story from some woman in Nevada who is clearly not yet over her experience.
Maybe it's fine and it's an enter at your own risk type space where you know that you're going to be exposed to all kinds of information, but my feeling is that if you're already a little anxious, a little unsure or feeling like something isn't quite right - online baby forums are not the space for you. Call your doctor, or at least seek out a reputable web page.
I am certainly one girl who has learnt her lesson. Like in Year 7 when my best friend made me watch horror movies with her and I had nightmares for weeks, I realised pretty quick to say no or to dive for the romantic comedy before she could get to the VCR.
From now on, I will ask my inner advisor before I go foolishly wandering into the forum forest.
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